… there’s an old man who lived to his 90′s and one day passed away in his sleep. And his wife, she stayed for a couple of days and passed away. I’m sorry I know that’s a strange way to tell you that I know we belong…”That is how I began a post written on my wedding blog on September 29, 2009. Last Wednesday, Luke and I went to the Ben Folds concert at the DSO for our anniversary. Seeing Ben Folds perform live has been one of my strongest musical desires for the last 5 years or so. And it was everything I had hoped and imagined. Our seats were amazing, the set was beautiful (all his family-friendly ballads), the Symphony was magical, and the night ended with my favorite Ben Folds' song.
Our song, "The Luckiest". It was perfect, that song has been our song since May 2008. It reminded me of our courtship, of the fact that I have worn a ring with that phrase inscribed on the inside everyday for the last two and a half years, and of the blog post I wrote below...
My great-grandfather passed away on March 23rd in his sleep at age 92. He lived next door. His wife is still alive, but everyday she gives up just a little bit more.
I took the above picture 2 months before their 69th wedding anniversary. They were married 72 years. More than most people’s lifetimes.
That is what I want for us.
Everyday of their marriage, my Ama took care of my Wuelito. He was her everything and now she is alone in the home they shared together.
She’s really sick now and I’m trying to hold onto her as much as possible. I will never forget the moment I told her I was getting married…
It was after a long day at work and I was tired, but mom asked me to go check up on her because no one else was home. I walked in and she looked awful. She was recently off her radiation treatment and she had lost her voice due to vocal chord paralysis. I tried to greet her in the broken spanish I only practice for communicating with her. I hugged her and kissed her cheek and asked how she was. And waited as she explained with tears in her eyes all her pains in her whispered voice. Then I sat next to her and waited in silence.
That’s when I realized I had been engaged over a week and had not personally told her. So I showed her my ring and tried to explain when the wedding was.
I will never forget that smile that lit up her whole face. She grabbed my hand and pulled it to her face and kissed my ring with tears brimming her eyes. And she told me it was beautiful. That is one of the most precious memories of my life. No words of love could fill my heart like she did right then.
She is the strongest woman I know and I would give the world to be half of what she is. What she’s faced would have broken anyone else long ago. She is my namesake.
I pray she will make it to our wedding.
She is so happy about it and smiles whenever she hears the topic. We’ve taken to working on projects like the invitations at her house. It makes her feel involved.
I love her in away I have never been able to express to her. All I can say is…
“Mi Ama, ella es mi corazon.”
My great-grandmother died 3 months nearly to the day (December 27, 2009) after I wrote that post. It had been a long and excruciating battle and she left a vast hole that is still empty in many ways. I would never trade those last days with her... working on wedding invitations with my mom and Luke with her, our last family study session while trying to keep her calm, trying on my wedding dress for her just days before she passed.
I still stand by everything I wrote before and now as a wife, I hope I can be everything to my husband that she was to hers. And I know that Luke will mean as much to me as Wuelito meant to her after all those years.
So this is a post to them, my great-grandparents, their legacy, and my cherished husband to whom I say, "Nakupenda milele."
That is so beautiful! It gave me goosebumps.
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